What Kind of Movement is Stillness?
What kind of movement practice is stillness?
For the past three weeks, I’ve been wearing shoes with characteristics that I often warn folks away from. One of them is a boot with a rigid sole, padded insert and velcro straps, designed to keep my foot as flat and immobile as possible while I heal a tiny broken bone on the pinky toe side of my foot. The other is a boot from a pair that I haven’t been able to let go of yet. My last (very stylish) footwear with a thick, stiff heel and Vibram sole. I’m wearing that one on the uninjured foot just so I can bring my hips to as level as possible for the next three weeks until I’m released from these limitations.
Accidents happen
I have a tiny fracture in my 5th metatarsal. I stood up quickly on my foot when it was asleep and it twisted under me. Crack! Pain. X-rays. Crutches and the boot for a couple weeks while the bone began to heal. Now, awkward walking in the boot(s) on level ground for several more weeks. Dr. L says if I keep my foot still, I’ll be walking fine later this spring. As you might imagine, this stillness goes against all my instincts and most of my training.
The yin and yang of it
The principles of Nutritious Movement tell us that every one of our cells need a certain amount of “squish” to function well. As you practice Restorative Exercise you experience the benefits when you “move more of you, more often.” That’s still true for all the cells of my body except that 5th metatarsal. And wow, EVERYTHING REALLY IS CONNECTED! Not too surprising, I know. It’s a tricky kind of mind game to keep just that part of my body still, while nurturing the rest of me to keep moving. That’s where the boot comes in handy, er foot-y.
Having practiced and taught Tai Chi and Qigong for decades, I learned that the ancient Yin Yang symbol represents the natural and continuous transformation of seeming opposites. How movement, for example, arises from stillness, how stillness cannot exist without movement.
Feel this for yourself. Stand with feet hip distance apart. Breathe naturally and relax as you become more and more still. Feel how some muscle movement is required to maintain stillness. Notice your breath moving in and out on its own. And now maybe more deliberately as you turn your attention to the breath. This is simple Qigong, balancing the energies of movement and stillness.
Bones are amazing
While you are reading this, bone healing is happening. The 5th metatarsal has passed through the inflammation phase, with pain and swelling as blood rushes in to stabilize the area. We’re on to the production phase, when soft cartilage is transforming into hard bone around the fracture site. Once adequate bone healing has occurred, weight bearing (such as standing or walking) encourages bone remodeling, which is the last phase. The bone knows the shape it needs to become and with use, with movement, it will strengthen. I’ll be in the boot for five weeks when x-rays will show how things are going.
Five stages of grief
“Oh no!” I thought as my foot landed on the floor in a way that seemed really wrong. “This can’t be happening right now.”
“Crap! I have to cancel a client, stop what I’m doing, find out what happened, see if urgent care is still open. Dammit!”
I tried standing on my foot just to see how bad things were. One step, not so bad. Two steps, not feeling so good. Three steps, forget it. This is really happening.
There have been a few days of feeling really down. The first week on crutches when my hands hurt more than my foot. Last week, when I was frustrated about not being able to drive. Then I texted a friend and asked for a ride to do errands and that turned into a nice visit.
Denial. Anger. Bargaining. Depression. Acceptance.
Of all the things I can’t do that I thought I needed to be doing right now.
Of all the things that I can do, in the kindest possible way.
And gratitude. For clients who offer rides to the studio for classes. For my spouse’s attention and willingness to witness me hurt and healing. For readers who may or may not see themselves in my story. May your injuries be few and your healing swift and complete.
Sole Food
Because my fracture is non-displaced, Dr. L agreed that the boot can come off while resting. I take my foot on backyard expeditions to get some barefoot time in the grass. Katy Bowman names this #VitaminTexture. So good for waking up those 7000 nerve endings in the soles of my feet.
While sitting still in the sun, I watch flocks of Robins returning to the bird bath and hummingbirds hovering at the feeder. I have come to know and appreciate the difference between the Black-headed Grosbeaks and the Rufous-sided Towhees visiting the seed and suet feeders.
I didn't need surgery
The thing that worried me the most about my injury was the possibility of needing a surgical repair. Thankfully, it wasn’t necessary. According to this New York Times article, “For many common problems of the knee, hip, shoulder, spine and wrist, nonsurgical options may be just as good. ACL, rotator cuff and meniscus repairs as well as lumbar spine decompression. Obviously this doesn’t apply to joint replacements. But it should give you pause as you consider the options for pain relief, mobility and functionality.” I would add toes, specifically bunions, hammer toes and plantar fasciitis to the NYT list. Consider your movement options when making these important decisions. Try Restorative Exercise first!
Let me remind you to move! Subscribe to the Aging Well newsletter. Delivered to your inbox on the first of the month.